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Last night when he pushed me up against the vanity,
he created this yellow tension in me. i don't
think he even tried to escape biology, he just
strung me and stretched me out
like a ribbon in a book,
and he's just got this look like sing for me, baby.

i'd been coexisting with my diaphragm up until now
when he showed me how easy
easy could be, like
counting the years between him and me

[it goes hut one, hut two, hut thirty]. He
drenched me in wine and took a good, hard look
at all the lines of which my body's comprised and
now i don't think it could elude his eyes
if i wanted it to. It's like
he's got me feeling and i don't know what to do;
he wants to hold me down and show me what he can do
but the half light's half choked me,
soaking me in this jaundiced glow [he should
really slow me down, he should really
go slow].

He's drinking my skin and i'm here thinking he
puts the sub in sublime, one moment he's spitting out
his contagious english [benign enabler of my
childish anguish]
and the next he's gasped "baby" too many times. But
he's privy to my former self, when i was slung deep
into the earth on the sides of my little girl feet,
past arches and posture, into warm and graceless sexuality.
He must have tasted that in me, he must
know how i can be.
mildly sickening.

edit: WOW thank you all so much for your feedback. It is tremendously appreciated.
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-09-17
Lolita. by ~AntoinetteGiulia is a vividly ugly portrayal of a hideous act that toes the line between vilifying the perpetrator and the victim. ( Suggested by UnspecifiedUnknown and Featured by Nichrysalis )
magdalenacaracol Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2013
I love this a lot <3
PatternVSUser Featured By Owner Sep 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I love the way this bounces easy language and metaphores and the the unique way you describe certain things ("contagious english", "yellow tension").
Concora Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013   Writer
This is incredible spoken word. The rhythm is just divine. 
KuyaNix Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
grats on the DD
TheDovahBrine Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Funny thing... The song Lolita by The Veronicas came on while I was reading this... I'm also a Lolita. Everything fits together.
Kr8t0s Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013
Very very sensual
ShadowedAcolyte Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013
This is rich with imagery. My brain filled in all the necessary sights and sounds and smells, which means the underlying details were just right. Thanks for sharing, and congrats!
MissManz Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I don't see any pedophilia in this, so why the warning?... Am I missing something?
Nichrysalis Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
The title is an allusion to the notable novel Lolita, whose main character of the same (nick)name is a young girl who has been forced into an incestuous relationship with her stepfather. More than that though, there are quite a few places in the poem that help to give an overall idea of the situation described, especially the last stanza.
LiteTheIronMan Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013
it's not forced. the stepdaughter becomes sexually curious and begins a relationship with her stepfather. in the Kubrick film, her age is changed so she's slightly older than she was in the novel
yvonne84 Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I haven't read the novel itself, however when I saw the most recent movie I was under the impression that the young girl was not forced into the (still wrong) relationship. 
There were many scenes in which the girl happily and curiously participated, and the theme of the movie seemed to be the feelings of the stepfather and the fact that he didn't like those feelings (fought against them). 
I could remember it slightly inaccurately, it has been some time since I've seen it.
MissManz Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Karinta Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Student General Artist
Ugh... only by the title -

But it's detailed metaphorically - it's pretty neat.
ShadowWolfsConsort Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
The title alone gave me a good guess on what this would be centered around. Beautifully written, yet with every verse it made my gut tighten more and more. :(
QuantumPhysica Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is really intriguing, sickening and yet sensual in a way that it probably shouldn't be. A forbidden fruit with a definite bitter aftertaste... I love it! 
Lintu47 Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
    Congrats on the DD! :dalove:
    Have a nice day! :heart:
ianjolie Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2013  Student Writer
Domination, and so "sub in sublime" made me arch my brow, what. I liked the poem, though. Hurt like only the young at heart can.
AntoinetteGiulia Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you! It was a stab at irony - using sub more generally as a prefix and juxtaposing it with a shortened "submissive," taking advantage of how the abbreviation is usually read. I was really enjoying the numerous interpretations of it - my favorite being "subcutaneous." Not that anyone would likely read into it that way. Not anyone normal. 
ianjolie Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2013  Student Writer
F-ck normal.
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Submitted on
July 5, 2013
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